Sorry I haven't posted in a couple of days

Its been a bit hectic. After going to hospital again i just kind of shut down. Its all getting a bit much now im coming to terms with the fact that im probably going to have the bag for life. I dont want to, but i know thats what is going to happen.

There are many positives to it i know, but so many sad emotional negatives.

1. my kids seeing their daddy with a bag on his stomach and trying to understand why
2. not being able to go swimming or go to the beach without wearing some special thing to cover it
3. not being able to wear tight shirts or just normal fitting t-shirts 
4. never ever having a shit again. like ever.
5. going to a new place like uni and being known as 'the guy with a bag' because no-one would have known me be anything else
6. knowing colitis won.